Thursday, November 20, 2008

The Green-eyed Monster


As women we are subject to totally different kinds of pressures than men, so ladies why is it that we are SO petty, hateful, jealous and down right cruel? How come we have such hard times being happy for each other? Why are we so spiteful?

As readership grows more and more ladies come with various topics they would like to be discussed, this being one of them, what is our problem with seeing each other happy? Clearly we know that misery LOVES company and that should be no secret, but why does it bother us so badly to see our sister-friends doing well.

Women are the most catty people, for instance if we see a nice looking man who appears to have it together we want him, but the second we see a woman come to his side we have to tear her to shreds with criticism. Could it be that we're not looking to criticize her but our own shortcomings? And why can't she be happy and enjoy a relationship? Further more, how come we have to go after what does NOT belong to us? If a man tells you, or you find out that he's in a relationship, that should be it, back away and walk off. But instead we flirt, finagle and finesse our way into his good graces and when he refuses to leave his girl, we (as in you) have the nerve to get mad and want to tell. We'll never reach any kind of happiness this way, how can we want/expect for some one to respect our relationship when we won't do the same?

This pettiness isn't limited to the lack of respect for relationships but in friendships as well, we forget that it's a two-way street. Loyalty is important, but yet again we find ways to cut ties in order to sever a friendship, over virtually nothing. We may not even need a reason other than, she didn't speak to me. Now over time it's understandable where the problem is but to be upset over something like this happening once...get real; but several times, now we have a valid argument! We argue over boys, we fight over clothes and will scratch and claw each other to the ground for what we want or THINK is ours.

Any kind of "friends" that we have would not take us on emotional-rollercoasters on the daily, real friends want to see us succeding, happy and loved.

Realistically this is our problem: we want respect but refuse to give it, we want what we can't have just because we can't have it and we hurt each other because we're really the ones hurting. If we took the time to evaluate our own lives and circumstances, the issue wouldn't be worth the drama.

It's human nature to want what we can't have, but we shouldn't take it from each other to appease our own insatiable appetites.

Marinate on this: "When I look at you, I see myself. If my eyes are unable to see you as my sister, it is because my own vision is blurred. And if that be so, then it is I who need you either because I do not understand who you are, my Sister, or because I need you to help me Understand who I am." Lillian P. Benbow

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Women are very competitive when it comes to relationships, we do not want to see another women doing better than we are. Back in the day they use to have this poem that says sugar and spice and everything nice that is what little girls are made of, try hammers and nail.


Keeping it real

Anonymous said...

APPLAUSE APPLAUSE!!!! Well written my blogging goddess. It is so funny how I am realizing that we act and think alike more and more each day. My new piece that I am working on is call "Misery loves Company" to highlight characteristics of the same subject! I love you so much Keya. U have really allowed me to see certain situations in a different light. You are so right about WOMEN when it comes to jealousy!!! We are the inventors of the word itself in my opinion. We as women need to stop worrying about the things we can't control and appreciate the blessings we are currently receiving. Being hateful and petty is only shortening our next blessing(s). You never know what the next person is going through and for you to exude hateful assumptions upon is down right ridiculous. Why treat someone disrespectful just because you do not understand them, or because you are jealous of what they have? It makes not a bit of sense. Life is about progressing and not stressing! Live your own life and learn from your experiences ladies. Time is not forever! You never know when you will need a helping hand and the person you have been so petty with for no apparent reason will be the only person there to help you. Should they be a Christian and lend a helping hand? or RETURN what they have received????

~Be a witness of friendliness instead of PETTINESS!!!~

~Britaine'

Anonymous said...

This is so true im really not good with words but i can only speak what i feel. I dont believe we will ever get the answer to why women are so catty. I believe it is a problem within that they arent confident and self motivated enough to know that God can too bless them with things and a good man. But its also up to the man as well if he acts on response of a inadequate woman because like that saying goes, " never leave the one you love for the one you like because the one you like will leave you for the one they love". Sometimes men dont understand that because they only live for the moment and dont look at the future and thats the problem. When girls hate, and try to get you down, which they cant do because no human can change or mess up Gods plan, that just lets us know we're doing something right. I guess we will never know, just dont give misery that company and continue to keep our head up! YEsssss siss so talented
~love Mel