Mixed Signal=Traffic Jam

Lately I've been hearing a lot about people sending mixed signals in relationships and to be honest it seems to me that the main reason for the confusion is that people are unable to clearly communicate their thoughts and feelings.

The other day, a good friend told me that "communication rules the nation," now as cheesy as that sounds, it's true. How can we be involved with some one and not know how to explain how we feel. Mixed signals are problematic, obviously because they are difficult to interpret.

Often times we find ourselves getting mentally tongue tied making it harder to articulate how we feel. More so, I think that when we get this way it's from one of three things: we're not sure how we feel, don't want to hurt feelings or we're playing games. I hate to be crass but these are the only real reasons for an emotional mix up.

For example if you're not sure of your own feelings, the safest thing to do is to let the other person know what's on your mind. Clamming-up isn't an form of expression, but quite the opposite. When you're fighting an emotional battle within your self, you don't suffer, your lover does. Only because they can't read you.

Secondly, we send mixed signals because we think that it's the best way to save face, keep from being the "bad" guy, and let the person down easily. It's not. Be an adult and flat out tell them that your not interested and keep it moving.

Lastly, people send mixed signals because they are playing games. Common courtesy says that you treat people the way you want to be treated. If you don't want any one to play with your heart, and constantly yo-yo-ing your heart back and forth then do them a favor and let them go...sometimes I think we hold on to people because we want them, but just not yet. You want them to be there when you're ready to settle down. Life doesn't work like that. It's not fair to hold some one an emotional hostage until you're ready to be what they need you to be. In the end you'll only make them bitter toward you.

I'll leave you with this: if mixed signals cause traffic jams on the streets, doesn't it stand to reason that they would do the same in your life? Be clear, mean what you say and say what you mean. Mixed signals=Traffic Jams