After a conversation with my sexy, juicy and emotionally sporadic friend (she made me say that); it has come to my attention that we are all completely spastic!
Brace yourself, this is going to be a long one.
About eight months ago she ended an extremely long relationship with her high school sweetheart and quickly entered into a new whirlwind romance with a man who seemed to sweep her off her feet (as most southern gentlemen do). Almost immediately their new feelings blossomed and she was ready to pick up her life and move to another state to pursue her new found love. He read her thoughts, and seemingly catered to her every romantic whim, things appeared to be going in the right direction for once. She said "I knew what it was like to be a bad relationship and so did he, so neither of us wanted to continue that cycle." After moving herself practically across the country, the two moved in together and things took an awkward turn.
How come we have such high and unreasonable expectations for our lovers and not for our selves? What happens to make us change our minds and move out of the "honeymoon phase" and into a place of indecisiveness and uncertainty? Why aren't we able to make a decision and stick with it long enough to see what the outcome of a situation is?
When we really have time to think about things and reality begins to sink in, we are able to see that we may have been too hasty with our thinking and decision making and could have possibly made a mistake. Often times we are our own worst enemy. We over think, over process and over analyze everything to the max, pushing our emotional capacity to the brim. Love is uncertain and not promising on any level, we say one thing and do another, so in essence there is no way to even to pretend to guess what another person will make us feel for what they would do.
I feel as though we have to know exactly what we want out of love and relationships. (Laughing) Even though the possibility of know what we DO want is out weighed heavily by being certain of what we DON'T want. With that being said what does it take to be completely decided on something? What would make us feel secure enough in our relationship to stay, wait it out and see where our love takes us?
There are so many options in life, that we have problems making decisions; we don't know whether to go left or right, up or down or just go straight down the middle. So how in the heck are we supposed to know if we've made the right decision?
The answer here is simple...there is no right answer. We have to be secure enough to know what we want (or pretend to be), know that love is enough and be willing to take the road less traveled. Knowing everything is not what we REALLY want.
Remember that ignorance is bliss and uncertainty is sometimes the best kind of certain.
2023. (Written early 2023)
1 year ago
2 comments:
That was some good shit friend, do ur thang thang girl:)
We as women have too many damn hormone problems if you ask me, some of us do some spur of the moment type shit a little too much!! It's not our fault tho that's just how some of us were created...We may be a little emotionally unstable sometimes (okay a lot of the time) but in the end we get our shit together and and not only do we express our love and dedication we prove ourselves also. That's why were so wonderful and beautiful!!:):)
One thing that differentiates women and men is this thing we call emotion. Example: A man has a problem, he thinks about it and then finds a solution. Awoman has a problem, she lets the problem affect how she feel. These feelings may then conflict with what she knows is right and in the end jeopardize what would have been the proper solution. This is a simplistic example but it gives a general idea of the point I’m trying to make and it explains why some women feel that they are on a daily “emotional roller coaster.”
I don’t know the entire story of your “sexy, juicy and emotionally sporadic friend” but if a situation seems too good to be true it’s usually because it is. Love is a game within itself and everyone can’t be a winner. It’s a gamble when you get in a relationship, definitely when you’re at the point were you want to make sacrifices for that person, such as relocating. It is important to always have a safety net. Your friend could have been in love, moved to be with her boyfriend but made sure she had some money in the bank to get a plane ticket or move out on her own if need be.
I know that I’ve had moments were I’m asking myself why I made the decision that I did. That’s why it’s important to not make decisions when mad/emotional and to always think it out, run it across someone if you have to and know it’s ok to be wrong. I’ve got a right to be wrong as my girl Joss Stone sings!
Relationships tend to move out of the honeymoon stage when it’s time for the dedication, commitment, trust, etc. to kick in. It is easy to love someone; it’s hard to maintain a relationship. I always say when poverty knocks on the door, love jumps out the window. It is important to never expect something of someone that you don’t expect of yourself. I apply this to all relationships, not just personal.
Post a Comment